(Death's) The Only Thing You Haven't Tried
by that-ship-dennel
Summary: What if Demi never got clean, and ended up in prison...with her dealer ... Dennel
1. Chapter 1

**Demi's POV:**

I'm dragged out of the van by the guard, he grips the handcuffs and pulls me towards the grey building, pulling a card out of his pocket, swiping it against the scanner pad and then pushing the door open and pushing me inside, following me while shutting the door behind him.

"Over there Lovato." He says, pointing towards a desk, he releases the cuffs and I slowly make my way towards the desk. "Sit." I do as he says; and he sits in front of me pulling out ink pads, opening them and placing them in front of me. He grabs my right hand and unlocks the handcuffs, taking them off my wrists and then placing them on the desk in front of me.

I gently rub my wrists, tracing my fingers over the black ink that covers them, tracing the lettering '_Stay Strong' _that's what I need to do in this hell hole, I need to stay strong. The guard grabs my right wrist again, rolling my index finger in the ink before pressing it into the correct box on the sheet of paper in between us; he repeats this for each finger on both of my hands.

"Stand up." He demands, I let out a sigh as I stand up and he points towards the room at the side. "Go." I groan and walk towards the room, I walk inside and he follows me, shutting the door behind him. A woman in uniform turns around, pulling latex gloves on to her hands and then leaning against the wall.

"This is Officer Peters, strip." The guard says to me and I stare at him in shock, he wants me to strip, what the fuck.

"Wait, what?"

"Strip."

"I am not stripping, do you know who I fucking am?!" I yell, glaring at the guard, he cocks his right eyebrow at me before smirking.

"I sure do popstar, now strip."

"My manager will hear about this." I say, pulling my shirt over my head, dropping it on the ground next to my feet.

"I'm sure she will princess." The guard says causing the other officer to laugh as I kick my jeans off and then stand in the middle of the room with my arms crossed over my chest. The woman officer grabs my arms and pulls then away from my chest before placing them at my sides and then patting by body down, fucking hell gloves feel disgusting.

"Turn around." She demands, I slowly turn around and then she pats my legs down and then spins me around again. "Underwear off, then squat and cough."

"What?"

"Just do it popstar." She says, kneeling down behind me as I slowly slide my underwear down my legs, leaving it around my ankles as I squat. "Cough."

I let out a cough and then she makes me stand up, I pull my underwear up my legs and she passes me my clothes again as the guard walks out of the room. I quickly pull my shirt over my head and then drag my jeans up my legs as she just stares at me.

"What?" I snap because she's fucking weird, stop staring at me!

"I know this is unprofessional but can I have your autograph?"

"What?!"

"F-for my little sister." She mumbles, looking at the ground, I let out a sigh as I step closer to her.

"Get me a pen and paper." I say causing her to grab her note pad and pen; she passes it to me and then shyly smiles at me. "What's her name?"

"Clara." She says and I write a quick note on the paper before signing it.

_Stay Strong Clara_

_Demi :)_

I draw a stupid picture in the corner of the page, passing it back to the officer and then handing her to pen as she smiles at me. We walk out of the room and into another room full of orange shirt and pants as well as shoes and a shelf of pillows.

"Shoe size?"

"Seven." I mumble as she grabs the orange pants and shirt, placing the shoes on top of them and then slides them towards me.

"Put them on, a van will be here to pick you up in ten minutes to take you to the prison." She says as I let out a groan and pull my shirt over my head, replacing it with the orange one and then kicking my jeans off, handing them to the guard as I pull the elasticated orange pants up my legs. I grab the shoes and slide them on as the officer places a pillow in front of me. I pick the pillow up and then turn around as she walks me out of the room and then outside, we stand in front of wire gates waiting for the van to turn up.

"Can you please stop staring at me?" I say, turning to the officer who is still staring at me.

"Sorry, I'm not used to having celebrities here."

"Whatever just stop staring at me, it's intimidating."

"You do realise that everyone will stare at you in there right?" She says as she van pulls up and a woman sticks her head out of the window, smiling at me.

"Hey Peters, hey Disney how's Mickey?"

"Frey, just open the door." The officer says and the platinum blonde woman rolls her eyes, pressing a button inside causing the door to unlock. The officer slides the door open and I climb in, throwing the pillow and bag on the seat next to me, resting my head back and letting out a long sigh. I look out of the open door and a tall brunette walks out of the building, wearing the same orange uniform I'm wearing and gripping on to a pillow as she makes her way towards the van. She carefully climbs inside and then sits next to me, placing the pillow on her lap still gripping on to it.

"Is that all for today?" The blonde driver asks, smirking at the officer who just glares at her.

"It is Frey, stay out of trouble."

"Of course Peters."

"So who do I have in Here today?" She asks as the officer shuts the door. "I mean I know Lovato, but who are you?" She asks, staring at the obviously scared brunette.

"G-Grace Helbig."

"Alright Helbig stop stuttering I'm not going to shiv you." The blonde says, smirking and then turning in her seat, starting the engine and then pulling away from the grey building and onto the road. "So what are you in here for Lovato?"

"Drugs." I mumble, staring out of the window, watching the trees sway in the wind because that is basically all I have to entertain myself.

"Possession or dealing?" She asks as she turns a corner and then continues driving down the empty road.

"Possession."

"Little Miss Disney locked away for drug possession, who would've thought it?"

"Whatever." I mutter, running my fingers through my hair, I really should've dyed it before I got sent here, who the fuck goes to prison with ombréd purple hair?! Fucking me that's who, means I'll just be noticed even more, fucking hell.

"So what's with the shaved patch Disney?"

"Why do you keep calling me Disney?" I ask, glaring at her through the rear-view mirror causing her to let out a laugh.

"Because I like it, now answer the question."

"I get bored with my hair, I do weird things to it when I get bored with it, so I dyed it and shaved a patch of it off." I reply, running my fingers over the shaved patch as the blonde turns to face me, smirking at me.

"Look a little bit gay Disney."

"Whatever, why do you care anyway?"

"You're going to a woman's prison and you're fucking hot and you look like a raging homo, princess you're going to get snapped up." She replies, glancing over her shoulder and winking at me causing me to glare at her. Grace just shifts uncomfortable in the seat, still gripping on to the pillow in her lap.

"What are you in for Helbig?"

"DUI plus drunk and disorderly." She mutters, slowly glancing up at me, I smile at her because to be honest I'm as scared as she is, I'm just not showing it because Demi Lovato does not show that she's fucking scared!

"Here we are ladies, grab your shit and follow me."

I grab my bag and pillow off the seat as she blonde slides the door open and then stands to the side as I jump out of the van, Grace follows me out and then all three of us walk inside. We walks through the heavy grey doors and into the building, past three guards that the blonde smiles at and then into the mess that seems to be the actual prison.

"Here's the common area." She says as we pass a room with tables and a few TV's. "The eating area." She mutters, pointing towards the canteen full of rows of empty tables. "And newbie rooms, Disney you're in here."

I let out a groan as she walks me inside a room with four bunks in it, three of them occupied by prisoners wearing beige clothes. They all glare at me and I throw my bag and pillow on to the spare bunk before climbing on to it and lying down.

"See you at dinner Disney, come on Helbig you're this way."

"Frey!" One of the girls in the room with me yells, walking towards the doorway and sticking her head into the corridor.

"What?"

"Has she got any in yet?" She asks, looking over her shoulder and then glaring at me, I just roll my eyes because I haven't even fucking done anything.

"Not yet, it'll be here tomorrow, but Disney over there is in for drug possession so you have a bestie now Cabello."

"So Disney, what was your drug of choice then?" She asks and I groan because I have a feeling that the nickname 'Disney' is going to stick with me for the entire time in here!

"Coke." I mumble, staring up at the ceiling.

~~~  
I'm still lay in my bunk staring up at the ceiling, expect the room is empty, I don't know where everyone else went and to be honest I really don't fucking care, just as long as I'm left alone I don't fucking care where everyone else is.

"Get up Disney it's time for dinner." Frey says from the doorway, I lift my head up and stare at her. "Come on get up." She says as I place my head back on the thinnest pillow ever, groaning because let's face it this is my life now, uncomfortable pillows and fucking orange suits!

"I'm not hungry." I mumble, placing my arms over my face and then letting out a groan because I can hear her walking into the room, what part of 'I'm not hungry' does this fucking bitch not get? Okay maybe I am hungry but I don't want to go and sit in a room full of other prisoner that will no doubt be calling me Disney as well.

"I don't care; you've got to eat Disney."

"I said I'm not fucking hungry."

"And I said that I don't fucking care, get your spoilt ass off that fucking bunk and into the fucking dining hall!" She yells, walking closer to me and grabbing my arm, pulling me off the bunk, okay that was fucking rude and it fucking hurt. She turns to face me, glaring at me while dragging me out of the room.

"Get the fuck off me." I say pulling my arm out of the grip. "Fucking hell I thought the paps were bad."

"Oh get over it popstar, you're not in La La Land anymore."

"No fucking shit blondie." I mumble as we walk into the dining hall and she drags me towards the queue at the front of the room, people begin to stare at me and I just stare at the ground. Frey pushes me forwards as the queue begins to move forwards.

"Here you go Hollywood." A woman says to me, handing me a tray of food while smirking at Frey who is stood behind me, whatever. Why the hell is everyone giving me stupid fucking nicknames, god I hate it here, why couldn't my lawyer have made sure that I only had to do community service, the overpaid cunt.

I walk away from Frey and glance around the room, walking past a group of girls that seem to be praying; as I walk past them one of them grabs my wrist and looks up at me I glare at her but she just stares up at me before giving me a small smile. Okay this is weird I would like to get out of this situation right now, no don't pull me closer to you, get the fuck off me.

"Sit with us; pray with us, god will help you." She says giving me a goofy smile, I rip my wrist out of her hand and step away from her while attempting not to laugh, I bite my bottom lip and she just innocently looks up at me waiting for me to answer her.

"Um no thanks."

"Fucking hell Hernandez, leave the poor popstar alone she doesn't want to fucking pray with you." Frey says, walking up behind me and then standing next to me, glaring down at the girl sat at the table in front of us. "Come on popstar you can sit with me."

"No, it's fine." I mutter, walking away from her and spotting a table that only two people are sat at, I walk towards it and place the tray down, sitting down and then letting out a groan because the food looks so unappealing.

"What the fuck are you doing?!"

"I'm sitting down, what does it look like I'm doing?" I answer, staring at them because it's pretty fucking obvious what I'm doing, is everyone fucking stupid in here?

"Get the fuck up and get the fuck off our table!" The Hispanic looking one of the pair screams at me, slamming her fists into the table as she stands up and glares at me.

"Whatever."

"Listen fucking Disney, move your skinny white ass before I fucking kick it!"

"Hansen, Kordei stop yelling and leave Disney alone, she didn't know about your fucking Beyoncé time okay." I look up and she's stood in front of me, looking down at me smirking with her eyebrows kinked before she flashes me a crooked smile. "So what are you in here for Disney?"

"You should know." I mumble pushing the tray away from me and then stand up, walking away from her and then walking out of the dining hall before making my way back towards the room I'm staying in. I walk into the room and climb on to my bunk and she follows me inside and then stands at the end of my bunk staring at me with a fucking smirk on her face.

"What do you want?"

"Okay let's get one thing straight, I run this place, you have no power and no say over what happens okay Demi. None at all and don't even think about pulling that 'do you know who I am' bullshit because no one here fucking cares."

"I don't care; get the fuck away from me Jennel."

"Still a fucking spoilt brat I see, you know Demi if you were to be with me in here no one would touch you. They'd be too scared to touch you." She says, brushing a strand of my hair behind my ear and then smirking at me.

"Do not fucking touch me." I say through gritted teeth, batting her hand away.

"Fine if that's the way you want to be then fucking fine, have fun in here Demi." She says, walking away from me and then making her way back towards the dining hall I lie down again, turning to face the wall and then aiming my fist into it before screaming.

How the fuck did my life get so bad that I ended up here?


	2. Chapter 2

**Demi's POV:**

I'm lay in my bunk with a blanket covering me as a voice is blasted out of the speakers outside the room. I pull the blanket over my head and then attempt to go back to sleep, but you know when you're in a room full of criminals and you know that they're all awake now it's kind of hard to go back to sleep.

I keep the blanket over my head though, staring at the wall as I hear the other girls getting out of their bunks, shuffling around the room and mumbling to each other. The second I hear the word 'Disney' come out of one of their mouths I kick the blanket off my body and then sit up, pulling the blanket back around my body and then leaning against the wall, pulling my legs up so my knees are practically pressed against my chest.

"Morning Disney." Frey says, leaning against the doorframe while smirking at me, I run my fingers through my hair; nope morning hair was never a look I could pull off.

"Hi."

"So what's the history between you and Garcia?"

"There isn't one." I mutter, pushing the blanket away from me and then jumping off my bunk, grabbing the small bottles of soap that they gave me when I came in, I walk towards the door way, shoving past Frey and then making my way towards the showers, I think, why is this whole prison set out like a fucking maze?!

That fact that I have to be in here is annoying anyway but the fact that everyone is calling me Disney and somehow they all know that something went down between Jennel and I is just making this whole fucking experience even more annoying.

I walk into the bathroom and throw my things into a shower, sliding the plastic curtain shut before pulling the fucking stupid orange top over my head and then hanging it on one of the stupid plastic hooks on the wall. The curtain slides open and a girl with long black hair is smirking at me, I kink my eyebrow at her but don't bother covering my chest because let's be honest with the amount of drugs I was taking everyone has probably seen me topless.

"What?"

"Nice ink you got there Disney."

"Thanks, is there a reason you're staring at me?"

"Garcia sent me to get you."

"Well I don't want to see her." I mutter, grabbing the curtain out of her grip and then shutting it again, she rips it open though, glaring at me. I just roll my eyes because I seriously can't even fucking shower without been fucking bothered.

"Well you don't have a choice Disney, shower and I'll wait here." She says, smirking at me and then leaning against the sinks as I close the curtain again, I kick the orange pants off and leave them with my shirt before turning the shower on and leaning against the cold tiled wall. I let the water wash over me, letting out a muffle sigh as I run my fingers through my slightly knotted hair.

"Yo Disney hurry the fuck up I don't have all day."

"Well then fuck off and leave me alone, I don't want to go and see her." I mutter, washing the soap out of my hair while attempting to keep one eye open in case anyone decides that it'd be a fun idea to crash my shower. To be honest I find it slightly rude that I wasn't allowed to bring my bodyguard in here with me, although I think Max would be scared…

"If you don't get out of that shower I will drag you out by your fucking hair."

"The hell you will, do you know how much this hair costs?" I reply, shutting the shower off and wrapping myself in a towel, pilling the curtain open and then walking out with my clothes in my hand. She smirks at me as I begin drying myself, her eyes raking over my bare, dripping wet body, I cock my eyebrows and she just lets out a giggle as I pull the crappy orange shirt over my head.

"You got yourself a rocking body there Disney."

"Thanks, I guess." I mutter, pulling the pants up my legs and then turning to face her, she's still smirking at me, god I fucking hate her already and I don't even know who she is.

"Come on princess she'll be waiting for us."

"Fan-fucking-tastic." I mumble, walking out of the bathroom, following the girl that I still don't know the fucking name of. She glances over her shoulder and smirks at me, stopping and then motioning for someone to walk up to us.

"Where is she?"

I lean against the wall while the two women talk, why did I have to go to the fucking prison that Jennel was in? I run my fingers through my slightly damp hair, damn I wish they had hair dryer and straighteners here, could you kill someone with hair straighteners? Probably.

"Hey Disney." Jennel says, standing in front of me while smirking at me, I glace at her before rolling my eyes and then crossing my arms over my chest.

"What do you want Jennel?"

"Just checking up on you." She replies, still smirking at me as she stands next to me, leaning against the wall as the still nameless inmate stands in the door way watching us.

"Bullshit, what do you actually want? Let me guess, you don't want anyone to know that underneath this whole scary drug dealer persona you put on you're actually a nice person that would rather stay in and watch crap TV than go out and get high with your 'bitches' as you love to call them." I say, pushing myself away from the wall and then standing in front of her.

"Shut up Demi." She says through gritted teeth, grabbing my wrists and gripping on to them while she glares at me, I just roll my eyes at her before pulling my wrists out of her grip. "Linguini fuck off for a bit." Jennel says to the lovely inmate that dragged me out of my shower.

"It's fucking Jauregui you bitch!"

"Whatever just fuck off for a while."

"Where do you want me to go?"

"I don't fucking know think for yourself, you do have a brain don't you?"

"Fuck off Garcia." She mutters under her breath, pushing herself away from the doorframe and then walking down the corridor. Jennel turns to face me, running her fingers through her hair and then giving me a slight smile, the same fucking smile that affected me months ago.

"Demi you have no idea what it's like in here."

"Are you scared in here Jennel? It is scarier that when you were outside? You're not hiding from gangs with guns that want you dead in here Jennel; you've got no one to run from."

"Well apart from myself." She mumbles, resting her head against the wall and then letting out a long sigh. "I'm not scared of being in here; I'm scared of being left alone with my thoughts."

"Why?"

"Because you're in here and I'm scared of being near you because it just messed my head up."

"Are you scared of me Jennel?" I ask, still glaring at her because she has no reason at all to be scared of me, I probably have more of a reason to be scared of her, I mean she is the big drug dealer that has had people killed before just because they looked at her in a funny way.

"I didn't say I was fucking scared of you." She says with her voice slightly raised while glaring at me, shoving me backwards. "Fucking celebrities that think everything is about them." She hisses into my face and then walking away from me, she looks over her shoulder and glares at me, turning the corner, leaving me stood in the middle of the corridor even more confused that I was before.

_I stumble towards the bar pushing past the drunk people and then smirking at the barman as he pours me me my fourth or fifth double vodka and coke; he slides it towards me and I give me $10 and tell him to keep the change, what? I'm fucking rolling in money, I can tip whoever I fucking want to._

_I pick up the drink and then walk towards the V.I.P section that the manager cornered off for me, which I then invited my dealer and her 'crew' in to. I push past the security guard and smile at Jennel as she holds up a little bag filled with the love of my life, the finest of the fine. Cocaine. _

_I stumble towards her, chewing on my bottom lip as I get closer to her, she smirks at me and I wrap my arm around her shoulder and fall against her causing her to chuckle at me as she slings her arm around my waist and presses a light kiss to the side of my head._

"_Do you want some princess?" She asks me, holding the bag in front of me and then smirking at me when I roll my eyes at her._

"_Of course I want some, fucking hell who do you think I am?"_

"_Here you go popstar." She says, handing me the bag and then pulling a rolled up $20 bill out of her pocket, passing that to me as well. I slide my hand into my pocket to pull out the money to pay for this bag but she grabs my wrist. "This one is on me Lovato, think of it as you by five you get the sixth free, like a loyalty card." She says winking at me and then _

"_Well, what can I say, you sell the best." I reply, walking towards the sofa with the table in front of it, I pour the powder onto the table and then cut it into neat thin lines, bringing the $20 bill up to my nose and then snorting three lines as Jennel sits next to me, slinging her arm around my shoulders. _

"_You're one naughty Disney star Demi."_

"_Well then it's a good job I'm not with Disney anymore isn't it?" I say, turning to face her while lightly biting my bottom lip, I rest my head on her shoulder and she keeps her arm wrapped around me as her 'boys' walk towards us._

"_I've sold out boss." One of them says and Jennel just looks up at him, glaring at him and then holding her free hand out, he slaps down a pile of cash and then she slides a locked black box towards him. He looks down at it confused before unlocking it and then looking towards Jennel._

"_Don't just look at me like a fucking idiot, just get more and sell it."_

"_You said I only had to sell fifty bags."_

"_Yea well I changed my mind, sell another fifty." She states, pulling me closer to her as I just sit there smiling like a fucking idiot as I trail my fingers up and down her thigh, not paying attention that anything else that is happening right now. "How are you feeling popstar?"_

"_Happy." I reply, looking up at her as she grabs her beer off the table and then drinks a mouthful, giggling at me as I stand up, pulling her with me and dragging her out of V.I.P area and into the mass of people that are dancing._

"_What are you doing Demi?" She asks as I face her, wrapping my arms around her neck. _

"_Dance with me Jennel." I whisper into her ear, she places her hands on my hips and I begin swaying my hips in time with the music._

~~~  
"Come on Lovato you've got visitors." An officer says from outside the room that I'm temporarily sleeping in; I slide out of my bunk, running my fingers through my hair as I walk towards her. She gives me a small smile as walks down the corridor with me following her. She gets to a door and slides a card out of her pocket to open it, holding it open for me as I walk through.

"Who is visiting me?"

"They told me not to say." She replies as we get outside a room with a blue door, she places her hand on the handle and then presses down, pushing the door open and then motioning for me to go inside. I smile when I notice Natalie and Phil sat there, Natalie smiles back at me but Phil just gives me a disapproving look while shaking his head at me.

I walk towards the table that they're sat at, the officer pulls the chair out for me and I sit down as Phil leans down and opens his brief case, pulling out a pile of papers, I let out a sigh and Natalie gives me a reassuring smile.

"I miss you." She mumbles, tapping her foot against mine, probably because she watches too many programs about prison and things that I can't actually touch her.

"I miss you too Nat."

"Well isn't this a mess Demetria." Phil says, dropping the pile of papers on to the table causing both me and Natalie to jump slightly, he just rolls his eyes and then sorts through the papers.

"Yes Phil I know it's a mess."

"But do you know the extent of the mess you and your prison sentence have caused?"

"Why are you saying like that? Like I own the fucking prison sentence, it fucking owns me. Just get to the point Phil, please." I say, placing my hands on the table and then lacing my fingers together as he just slides a sheet of paper towards me.

"There is no nice way to say this Demi, you've been dropped." He says and I just stare at him in shock. I can't have been dropped, I know people that have been in prison for crimes worse than drug possession that have kept their record deals, fuck.

"I-I've been what?"

"They sent the papers to me, they don't want a criminal on their record label because they're owned by Disney, I'm sorry Demi."

"This is fucking bullshit." I mumble, running my fingers through my hair as I fight off the tears that are threatening to roll down my cheeks at any moment. "They can't fucking drop me."

"They can Demi; it's in the small print in your contract."

"Where?"

"Section ten, paragraph six, if the named at any point during their contract commits a federal offence then the record label has the right to end the contract without warning." He says, passing me a copy of my contract and then showing me the section that he just read to me. I read over it and then place the paper in front of me as I lean back in the seat.

"Fuck."

"Demi it's not that bad."

"Fuck off, I just got fucking dropped no one is going to want to sign me when I'm out." I reply, leaning forwards and glaring at Phil while Natalie attempts to calm me down my dragging her foot up and down my leg, she knows that nay contact with people I like will somehow calm me down.

"We can fix this, people will want to sign you Demi, and you've got one of the best voices of this generation."

"Too bad I've got a fucking bad reputation." I mumble, pushing myself away from the table and then standing in. "Can you guys go please, I'm sorry Nat I know you want to talk to me but I just need to be alone." I say as the officer walks towards the door with me.

"It's okay D; I'll be back for visiting with Marissa okay."

"Okay, tell Maddie that I miss her." I mutter as I walk out of the room with the guard following me, I stop walking and lean against the wall because I know that I'm going to cry and there is no way I am going to cry in front of those people. I stare at the while wall in front of me as tears begin to roll down my cheeks. I quickly wipe them away as the officer stands next to me, I turn to face her and she gives me a reassuring smile.

"Come on Lovato, I haven't got all day." She says, placing her hand on the top of my arm as I slowly nod my head and then let out a muffled sob as she pushes me forwards.

"O-okay." I mumble as the tears freely roll down my cheeks, I keep my eyes focused on the door in front of me in an attempt to keep the oncoming panic attack at bay.

"Do you need anything?"

"J-just be quite for a minute." I say in between short breaths as my breathing quickens and I begin to shake slightly, fuck. I need Marissa and I need her now, she was always the one to calm me down when this happened, I don't know why no one else could but they just couldn't.

"Lovato are you alright?" She asks standing in front of me; I look up at her and slowly nod my head while taking in a deep breath and then holding it for a few seconds before breathing out.

"I-I will be in a minute." I reply as she stands next to me and the other inmates begin to crowd around us, all mumbling to each other and staring at us. My breathing speeds up again and my chest feels as though it's closing up.

"Man what the fuck is going on with Disney?"

"Jauregui shut it!" The officer yells, walking away from me as I lean against the wall behind me, attempting to ignore the group that is forming around me.

"Move out of the fucking way!"

I lift my head up when I hear her voice, placing my hand on my chest as I continue to try and even my breathing out before this turns into a full blown panic attack.

"I said move out of the way! I swear to go if you don't fucking move I will break you!" She screams again and the inmates move out of her way, creating a path towards me. "Fucking hell, Demi look at me." She says, standing in front of me and placing her hands on my shoulders, I glance up at her and she gives me a small smile.

"W-what are you doing?"

"Shut up Demi, just focus on me okay. Ignore everyone else and just focus on me, okay now breathe in." She says, looking into my eyes as I take a deep breath, she brushes the tears off my cheeks while smiling at me again. "Breathe out." She whispers to me and I let out a shaky breath.

"T-thanks." I mumble, brushing her hands off my shoulder and then attempting to walk away from her.

"You're not going yet Demi, you're still not calm." She says, pulling me back towards her and then placing her hands on my shoulders again. "Look at me and repeat what you just did." She says, leaning closer to me and then grazing her fingers against my neck as I let out a shaky breath.

"W-why are you doing this?"

"I don't know."

"Y-you still care about me?" I ask, staring into her eyes, she pulls away from me and then shakes her head at me.

"I don't fucking care about you." She says, leaning forwards and then brings her mouth to my ear. "Anymore." She whispers, pulling away from me and then walking away from me for the second time today.


	3. Chapter 3

**Demi's POV:**

I push myself away from the wall as I watch Jennel walking away from me, I run my fingers through my hair as Frey walks up to me and places her arm around my shoulder while smirking at me.

"I knew something was going on between you and her."

"There isn't anything going on." I mumble moving away from her slightly and then letting out a sigh as she steps closer to her and places her arm around me again.

"Sure there isn't Disney, she does just do what she just did for anyone, you must mean something to her princess." She says, unwrapping her arm from around me and then grabbing Helbig as we walks past us.

I walk in the same direction that Jennel walked away in, sliding my hands into the shallow pockets in the itchy orange pants that I have to wear, orange never was my colour. I turn the corner and she's stood there, leaning against the wall with her right leg bent at the knee as she rests her foot against the wall. I slowly walk towards her, lightly clearing my throat so she knows that I'm near her.

She turns her head to face me and then send me a small smile before sliding her foot down the wall as I walk closer to her. I smile back at her and then stand next to her, our fingers lightly brushing past each other's.

"Hi." I mutter, turning to face her as she continues to stare at the white wall in front of us. "T-thanks."

"Don't mention it; I still remember how to calm you down."

"And you still care."

"Shut up, I don't fucking care about you." She says her voice raise slightly but not enough for her to be yelling at me, it does make me flinch though.

"Yes you do otherwise you would have left me instead of barging through the crowd of people to get to me." I reply, pushing myself off the wall and then standing in front of her, she glances up at me and I have to admit that even though it's been months since she's looked at me like this it still makes me want to slam her against the wall and press my lips against hers.

"Shut up."

"No, I know that you fucking care about me Jennel."

"So what if I do!"

"I fucking missed you okay! When you fucked off I missed you!"

"You didn't miss me, you missed the drugs."

"No, if I missed the drugs I would've said, I missed you. I missed seeing you walking around my apartment in nothing but one of my hoodies and your lacy underwear. I missed waking up next to you, I fucking missed you okay!" I scream into her face, she stares at me in shock, cups my face smashing her lips against mine and then sucking my bottom lip into her mouth causing me to let out a muffled moan. I pull away from her and rest my forehead against hers; she slides her hands down from my face before she wraps her arms around my neck as she keeps her eyes shut.

"I'm sorry." She whispers as her fingers graze the back of my neck

"You should be." I reply, pulling away from her and then walking away from her, leaving her leaning against the wall, watching me walk away from her for once. She left me and now she gets to know what it feels like for someone to walk away from you, at least she isn't depending on me.

_I'm lay in the middle of my bed with Jennel slightly hovering above me, our bodies still somehow still pressed together, her lips are attached to my neck, and she's roughly sucking on the pale skin as I drag my nails down her back. She moans against my neck and I smirk before tangling my fingers in her hair and then pulling on it so she pulls her head away from my neck, she smiles at me and then smashes her lips against mine._

"_This shouldn't be happening." She whispers against my lips, I ignore her and drag my tongue over her bottom lip, she reluctantly opens her mouth and I slide my tongue between her lips, dragging it over the ridged roof of her mouth, she lets out a throaty moan as her hands slide down my body and she grips on to my hips, her nails digging into my skin, which only makes me moan into her mouth._

"_You started it." I mumble into her mouth, flipping us over, placing my legs either side of her waist and then grinding my hips down while smirking against her lips. _

"_You could've stopped it."_

"_I didn't want to; do you want this to stop?" I ask, pulling away from her and looking down at her while arching my eyebrows._

"_Oh god no." She answers, placing her hand on the back of my neck and then pulling me down to her, my lips smashing against hers again as her hands slide up from my neck and her fingers begin to thread into my hair. I pull back but only to pull my shirt over my head, throwing it behind me and then slowly unbuttoning her as she looks up at me, chewing on her bottom lip. _

"_What do you want me to do?"_

"_Fuck me, god just please fuck me Demi." She replies, pulling me back down to her and then biting down my neck, leaving sloppy kisses down to my collar bones as I grind my hips against her and her nails scratch down my back, fuck this is going to be good. _

"_I thought you wanted me to fuck you, at this rate you're going to be fucking me." I let out in between shaky breaths as she bites down on the exposed areas of my breaths while she works on undoing the hooks at the back, smirking against my skin when she does unhook it, I pull back and let it fall down, landing on her stomach as she looks up at my in awe. _

"_God you're fucking beautiful." She whispers causing me to blush and turn away from her; she sits up slightly and then places her index fingers under my chin, turning to head so I'm looking into her eyes. "I mean it, you are beautiful Demi." She says, emphasising the word beautiful before softly pressing her lips against mine. _

I let out a sigh as I walk back into the room I'm staying in, smiling at Cabello while walking towards my bunk and then jumping up, climbing on to it and then sitting cross legged. She stands in front of my bunk and smiles at me, pushing herself up and then shuffling towards me.

"Hello."

"Hi." I reply, staring at her in confusion because she seems like she actually wants to talk to me instead of getting me to see Jennel.

"You look nice with no make-up on." She says, smiling at me again as Jauregui walks into the room, leaning against the door frame.

"Um thanks I guess."

"She's right Disney, you look better without all of that make-up slapped on your face." Jauregui says, causing Cabello to grin at her as she walks into the room, smirking at both of us and then standing in front of me. "So what happened with you and Garcia?"

"Nothing."

"Well that's a lie, what happened Demi? She's just smashed our bunk up and I'm pretty sure it's because of you."

"Whatever." I mumble, placing my hands in my lap and then fumbling with my fingers while Cabello glares at Jauregui, she slams her hand down on the mattress and then looking at me, annoyance evident in her eyes.

"Something happened because I've never seen her like this before."

"Not my problem."

"I'll fucking make it your problem Disney." She replies, glaring at me that hard it feels as though she is looking into my soul, fucking hell she has demon eyes.

"Lauren leave her alone." Cabello says, sliding off my bunk and then wrapping her arms around Jauregui's waist while pressing her lips against her shoulder blade.

"Camila get off me, please. She made Jennel go fucking bat shit crazy and I want to know why."

"I didn't fucking do anything."

"Yes you fucking did, the only thing she said was your name."

"Jalapeño leave Disney alone." Frey says from the doorway causing me and Cabello to let out muffled giggles while Jauregui turns to face Frey and glare at her.

"I've told you before that it's fucking Jauregui you fucking cunt!" She yells, walking towards Frey and then grabbing her shirt before pinning her against the wall causing Cabello to rush towards them and attempt to pull her away from Frey.

"Baby stop it, you'll just get in trouble again."

"Camila get off me."

"No, all she did was call you a stupid name baby, but jalapeños are hot and so are you." Cabello says before pressing her lips to Jauregui's neck causing her to release Frey, who straightens her shirt and then walk past the pair that are now staring into each other's eyes. She walks towards me and then stands in front of me, looking up at me.

"What?"

"She wants to talk to you."

"And what makes you think that I want to talk to her." I reply, crossing my arms over my chest and then pulling my legs up, crossing them and then looking down at Frey who runs her fingers through her hair.

"The fact that you automatically know who I'm talking about as well as that slight sparkle in your eyes."

"Whatever, what does she want?"

"She just told me to come and get you because she wants to speak to you."

"Why couldn't she come and get me?" I ask, sliding off my bunk because I know that it's easier to actually go with Frey than sit in here and argue about why I don't want to go with her.

"I don't know do I, fucking hell Disney stop asking me so many fucking questions."

"Shut up."

"You're so lucky that you look cute."

"I've been told that before." I reply, smirking at her as we walk out of the room and she wraps her arm around me before turning us round a corner and then walking us towards Jennel who is stood at the end of the corridor leaning against the wall, glaring at Frey slightly, whatever.

"What do you want?" I ask when we get to her, she looks up at me, running her fingers through her hair and then letting out a soft sigh.

"We need to talk."

"The last time we talked you threatened to tell the media with I was taking drugs and partying every night." I reply, glaring at her as Frey unwraps her arm from around my shoulders, letting it fall to her side.

"So I guess I'll be going then." She mumbles, turning around and then walking back down the corridor as Jennel pushes herself away from the wall so she's stood in front of me.

"Shut up."

"No, god I fucking hate you."

"We know that's a lie."

"You're right it's a lie, I love you but I also fucking hate you so much!" I scream into her face before shoving her away from me and then turning around to walk away from her, she grabs my wrist and pulls me back towards her, wrapping her arms around me and for a brief second I remember how she used to wrap her arms around my waist the morning after she spend the night at my apartment.

"_Morning princess." She whispers into my ear as her arms wrap around my waist and she pulls my body close to hers, my fingers lace with hers and I smile to myself as she places soft kisses against my neck while the stereo fills my apartment with music. _

"_Morning." I reply, turning around in her arms and then pressing my lips against hers, causing her lips to form into a small smile against mine. _

"_Why did you get up early?" _

"_I couldn't sleep." I mumble against her lips as her hands slide up the back of my t-shirt, her palms resting on the arch on my back as she tugs my bottom lip in between her teeth causing me to let out a slightly moan. _

"_You could've woken my up; I would've kept you entertained."_

"_I'm sure you would've but you wore me out last night, stud." I reply, pulling away and then looking at her as she smirks at me, grazing circles on my back with her thumbs._

"_You wore me out too princess, as I recall I had to beg you to stop."_

"_It's not my fault that I can't get enough of you; you just taste far too nice." I whisper, leaning forwards and then capturing her lips between mine._

"Fuck, I missed you."

"I'm sorry Demi."


	4. Chapter 4

**Demi's POV:**

"Sorry doesn't cut it Jennel, you fucking hurt me."

"It wasn't my intention to hurt you, I was hurting too." She replies, cupping my cheeks while making me stare into her eyes.

"You fucking left me when I needed you, I fucking needed you."

"I got scared, I'm sorry."

"Scared of what exactly?" I ask as tears roll down my cheeks and I attempt to look into her eyes even though the tears clouding my vison are making it quite difficult.

"You."

"What are you fucking talking about? You had no reason to be scared of me Jennel! I was nineteen and I was constantly high, what could you possibly be scared of?!"

"I was fucking scared of you because you were making me feel things that I hadn't felt in years!" She screams in my face causing me to slowly back away from her as she roughly runs her fingers through her hair.

"You didn't have to leave me."

"I was protecting you."

"From what exactly…actually you know what I don't want a fucking answer because talking about this is killing me." I reply, turning around and letting out a breath before walking away from her, sliding my hands back into the horribly itchy pockets while Jennel calls after me.

"Demi I know I fucked up but can you just listen to me."

"No." I answer, turning to face her. "Because I'll listen to you and then I'll just fall for you all over again! I would say I'd start loving you again but that would be impossible because I never actually stopped fucking loving you Jennel!" I scream at her as she slowly makes her way towards me, I shake my head at her and then continue walking away from her again, ignoring her when she yells my name.

I walk straight towards the toilet block, ignoring the girls passing me and the guards that are intently watching me, because right now I just want to be alone and fuck I just need a line of coke…

I burst into the toilets and lock myself in one of the only two cubicles that actually have doors with locks on them; I slam the door shut and slide the lock across before leaning against it and then slowly sliding down it as tears begin to roll down my face. I thread in fingers through my hair and rest my head in my hands as I hear footsteps getting closer and closer to the cubicle I'm currently locked in.

"Disney are you in here?"

"What do you want Guacamole?"

"That's not even close and it's fucking Jauregui but I'll let it slide this once, open the door." She replies standing on the other side of the door and lightly tapping my lower back with her feet.

"Why should I? I'm pretty sure that you hate me."

"I don't hate you, I hate the fact that Jennel is so affected by you, but I do not hate you."

"Why are you even here? Shouldn't you be chasing after Jennel?"

"I'm here because Camila made me come in here, she loves you I hope you know that. Plus Jennel would just throw something at me and tell me fucking off, I thought coming to see you was the safest choice, so are you going to open the door or what Disney."

I shuffle away from the door and unlock it as I pull myself up off the ground, Lauren pushes the door open and I just stand there staring at her with tears still rolling down my cheeks. She steps into the cubicle, shutting the door behind her and then leaning against it while I slide my hands into my pockets.

"What's wrong?"

"I-I don't know."

"Yes you do, just tell me what's wrong Demi."

"I still love her."

"Shit." She mumbles, running her fingers through her hair. "This isn't good, she doesn't do love."

"Yea I fucking know that, that's the whole reason she fucking left me!" I scream at her, throwing my arms in the air, Lauren grabs my hands and then stares into my eyes, fucking hell it's like she's staring into my soul, no stop it.

"Calm down, getting like this isn't going to help you, it's just going to make you even more upset and possibly make you want to use."

"I already wanted to fucking use!" I scream into her face causing her to glare at me.

"Disney if you scream at me one more time I swear I will fucking kill you."

"I'm sorry, I just blocked out how much I actually loved her, but now she's back and I just…I don't know." I mumble as she wraps her arms around me and my head rests against her shoulder. "I hate her.

"Do you really?"

"No, I love her."

"When did you realise that you loved her?" Jauregui asks, running her fingers through my hair.

_Jennel wraps her arms around my waist and rests her head against my shoulder as we begin to slowly dance around my apartment. My arms are draped over her shoulders and my fingers are tracing over the back of her neck. _

"_Why are we dancing? There isn't even any music playing."_

"_So, you don't need music to dance Demi." She replies as we move backwards, she stumbles over a pair of shoes that I must have kicked off and not moved, but we end up lying in the middle of my lounge and she has her head on my chest and we're both giggling. _

_I place my arm around her shoulders as she slides her hand up my shirt and then traces shapes on my stomach. I lean down and press my lips against the top of her head and smile to myself because this is the only time that Jennel and I have been together and neither of us has been high. _

"_What's going through that little head of yours Lovato?" She asks, looking up at me and then bopping her index fingers on my nose before leaning forwards and then capturing my lips between hers causing me to smile against her lips. _

"_Nothing, I'm just thinking." I mumble against her lips as she pulls away slightly, I pout at her and she lets out a soft giggle, leaning forwards and then pressing her lips against mine again. _

"_Well what are you thinking about then?"_

"_I love you." I whisper, closing my eyes and then resting my head against the floor expecting Jennel to pull away from me, but she doesn't. She just softly kisses me again, brushing my hair out of my face. _

"_You too."_

"_Say it."_

"_I-I can't." She whispers against my lips, resting her forehead against my head as I place my hands on her hips._

"_Okay."_

"_Is that it? Okay? You're not going to scream at me and kick me out because I can't say it back to you?" She asks, staring at me like a confused a lost puppy, which just makes me want to press my lips against hers and make her stop panicking._

"_No, I'm not going to kick you out because I know that you want to say it but you just can't."_

"_How do you know that I want to say it?"_

"_If you didn't you would've got up and ran away the second I said it, but you didn't, you kissed me and right now that's enough for me." I reply, pressing my lips against hers and then smiling against her lips as I feel her arms slide underneath me and wrap around me._

"_I do though."_

"_I know."_

"_I'm sorry."_

"_Shut up."_

"So she didn't run away then?"

"No."

"I wasn't expecting that." Jauregui replies, running her fingers through her hair.

"She didn't run away straight away, she just stopped calling me as much, she stopped coming to my apartment as much as she used to and in the end she just completely cut me off, I started to get worse and she left me when I needed her the most."

"I kind of want to kill her."

"Yea don't do that, it's really not worth it plus you hate me."

"Disney I do not hate you, to be honest I'm starting to hate Jennel because she was a jackass."

"I would've preferred it if she did just leave when I first told her that I loved her." I mumble, leaning against the wall of the cubicle as Cabello and Frey walk into the toilets.

"Ay Disney, are you in here princess?!" Frey yells, causing Jauregui to groan before opening the door and walking out, pulling me with her. Cabello walks over to Jauregui and wraps her arms around her waist before resting her head on her shoulder and then smiling at me.

"What do you want Frey?"

"Just checking up on Disney, Cabello told me what happened and Jennel may have thrown a book at my head."

"Might make you a bite fucking smarter then."

"Bite me Jalapeño." Frey says to Jauregui, smirking at her and then smiling at me.

"It's fucking Jauregui."

"Whatever, come on Disney visiting is in a few minutes." Frey says, linking her arm through mine and then pulling me away from Cabello and Jauregui, who look like they're about to jump each other.

~~~  
I walk into the visiting room with Frey walking beside me, her arm still looped through mine, which causes Marissa and Maddie to give me strange looks.

"Don't go running off when we're finished in here Disney."

"I won't." I reply, walking away from her and then sitting on the plastic fold out chair that's on the opposite side of the table Marissa and Maddie are sat at. "How did you get mom to let you come here Maddie?"

"I didn't tell her, Marissa ran away with me, but who the hell is that?"

"Um…Frey, she's nice." I reply as Jennel walks into the room, avoiding looking at me as she sits down across from a slightly older women and a teenage boy, who I'm assuming are her brother and sister. I keep my eyes on Jennel as she continues to avoid looking towards me; Marissa turns to see what I'm looking at before turning to face me again.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me, what the hell is she doing here?"

"Probably the same thing I'm doing here." I reply, causing her to glare at me before lightly slapping Maddie's arm because she laughed.

"No time for humour Lovato! Has she said anything to you?"

"Yes, there was screaming and crying." I answer, not looking at her because I know I'll end up telling her that I kissed her and she'd end up yelling at me, but also if I look at her she'll know that I'm not telling her something.

"What else? I know you're not telling me something."

"We kissed." I mumble, still not looking at her.

"What?"

"W-we kissed."

"Fucking hell Demi." She mutters as I lift my head up and look at her, she's running her fingers through her hair while Maddie is glaring towards Jennel.

"Can we not talk about this please, just be my best friend and not my mother. I miss you, I miss talking to you about stupid things and I miss you holding me."

"I miss you too Dem, I need you to get out of here because as much as I love Dallas she's not you, she doesn't do hugs like you do and I know you can't cook but Dallas is worse." Marissa says, pouting at me as Maddie continues to glare across the room at Jennel, who is still avoiding eye contact with me.

"Marissa Callahan you let Dallas cook? Maddie stop glaring." I say, Maddie turns to face me again and innocently smiles at me while Marissa tries to come up with an excuse as the why she let Dallas cook.

"Yea…but that's not important, how's prison life?"

"It sucks, apparently I'm now called Disney, my label have dropped me and my kind of sort of ex is in here with me…so basically I'm living in hell."

"You'll be out next year Dem."

"So, that's not the point, I want to be out now, not next year."

"You do the crime, you do the time Demetria."

"Maddie shut up before I get some butch prison lesbian to shank you." I say through gritted teeth, leaning over the table and then glaring at her, she sits back in her seat and crosses her arms over her chest.

"Whatever."

"So how's life with Bea?"

"They're happening; I don't know she has a fucking court date next week so you never know I could be coming to visit both of you in here."

"Wait, what has she done?"

"She may have beaten some sleaze bag into a pulp because he said something about her mom's and then something about me."

"I knew there was a reason I liked her." I reply, smirking at Maddie as she glances up at me,shaking her head and trying not to smile at me.

"Shut up, criminal."

"You love me."

"I have to, we're related."

"That's just mean Madison, I'll get Bertha to come over and beat you."

"Bring it on." She says, smiling at me and then resting her arms on the table.

"I like seeing you smile."

"I miss you Demi." She mumbles, pulling the sleeves of her hoodie over her hands and then playing with the cuffs.

"I miss you too."

"Oh so don't miss me, fine then I'll leave." Marissa says, pushing her chair back and then going to stand up.

"Sit back down; you know I miss you as well. I miss everyone."

"Including Max."

"Of course I miss Max; I don't feel safe in here without him." I whine, pouting at Marissa as she laughs at me. "Bring him with you next time."

"I will, he keeps whining about not having some annoying popstar to look after."

"He loves me."

"I mean maybe that's a little bit true, plus I think he's coming up with Nat when she visits." Marissa replies smiling at me, while Maddie begins to rock back and forth on her chair. I glance towards Jennel and she's staring at me, chewing on her bottom lip while pretending to listen to what her sister is saying. I smile at her without thinking about what I'm doing, which makes Maddie and Marissa both turn around and glare at Jennel, who suddenly looks away from me.

"It would be nice if you two didn't glare at her because I do have to live in here with her." I say through gritted teeth as they both face me again, attempting to look innocent.

"I hate her."

"You don't."

"Whatever, don't you two have to leave?" I ask, standing up and walking towards the door that allows the inmates to walk back into the prison.

"Demi where are you going?" Marissa asks, chasing after me and grabbing my wrist.

"You're annoying me, visit me next week, I love you but both of you are annoying little shits, bye."

"Bye Demi, I love you too." Marissa mumbles, wrapping her arms around me and then holding me against her as Maddie rushes towards us and jumps on me, resting her head against my shoulder.

"I miss you Dem."

"I miss you too, I'm sorry I let you down."


End file.
